The Journey of Great Courageousness to gain a Recording of a Conversation...

THE FOLLOWING EVENTS ARE TRUE 

                     ...mostly.

It was a beautiful autumn morning, the sun was out and the birds were singing in the trees – and then I arrived, microphone in hand, to harvest the audio of this gentle world.

There! To the north: a gentle throb, the soft whispers of an approaching man. He came into view with a look of shock on his tired face – ‘Microphone’ he mouthed, horrified. I ignored his whimpers and told him to wait; the time would come – not now – but very soon!

The atmosphere was now frosty, not even a snowman could settle his concerns.

It was time to go, I told him, this would not be a sad day.  We boarded our carriage, the number 4 bus, and started our quest to find a conversation. It took many seconds to arrive at our destination; it seemed as though we would never arrive. I almost abandoned any hope of completing this task but then the comforting sound of automated doors filled my ears, I knew... we had arrived!

We stepped out into this metropolis of shops to see the annoyed face of our third amigo. “Why are you late?” he cried with genuine concern.  I gripped him by the shoulder and fell against the bus shelter regaling him with our ordeal on the bus.

He seemed sympathetic to my plight. I looked into his eyes and asked him, “Will you be in my conversation?”

He mopped the sweat from his brow, considering the implications of my proposal. “Yes... Yes, I will.”

I felt the life drain from me. I had fainted with excitement.

<-------<< 10 MINUTES LATER >>------->

I awoke to the sweet smell of fast food. My eyes drifted open and immediately closed again, blinded by a huge white light.

I dragged myself to a seating position, we were sat in a park upon a park bench. Even in my drowsy state, I knew that this was the time - this was where I would get my realistic recording.

I raised the microphone in their directions and then waited - little could prepare me for what then ensued. A plethora of conversation about... about... their favourite films. It was so simple yet so ingenious. The words formed and reformed, their tones shifting and transforming.

A clicking sound.

His hands in front of my face, interrupting me from my euphoria.

"Is that enough?" he asked, non-plussed by the marvel that had just occurred.

"Yes," I said, "Yes, it was perfect."

The quest was complete but the day was not, other tribulations did face us this day: the great money spillage of John Lewis, the thunder storm of surprise and events that can never be read - only experienced. They will all have to wait. All that matters is that I now have a recording.

And as I attempted to play it on my computer, I encountered problems, the file would not convert. The elders of technology were against me. The quest may be over, but an ongoing struggle still remains.

Tune in next week for the next exciting instalment of...

"The Recorder"